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"Oh no. Love of my life, please don’t cry. I don’t mean to scare you. For every potential bad omen there will be a favorable one. Just remember, when you are laying in bed and you feel your left arm become numb—that’s me, holding onto you tight… or it’s a stroke. Take a couple of aspirin and go to the nearest ER. You know, just in case, baby."
A Pragmatic Romantic Says Farewell To His Lover, from McSweeney’s
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